Lame Celebrity Sightings, Part One

If you're interested in reading about the lamest celebrity sightings, there is really no need to look any further. Since I live in the glamorous environs of Hollywood North, I have access to celebrities at work and play. 

Here is my list of lame celebrity sightings, in order of how boring they were. Please share your own celebrity encounters with me.

4.) Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell

I was trapped on a city bus, heading up West Broadway towards Future Shop. when I noticed a woman on the street - she happened to have exceptionally nice hair and an excellent figure. She was locking up her mountain bike near the bus stop. Her back was to me, but I was transfixed by her incredibly silky blond hair - it really did look glorious.

When she turned around, I realized it was Goldie Hawn, looking much better than in photographs. Kurt Russell was beside her... they were both wearing Lycra bicycle shorts and heading into Golden Szechuan for lunch.

Murmurs of interest rippled through the Number 9 Broadway bus as everyone gazed at the celebrities. Then, the moment ended, and I forgot all about it: until now.

3.) Ryan Reynolds

This guy is fairly hot, so there was some degree of prurient interest on my part when I first beheld Ryan at the Vancouver Auto Show a few years ago. However, this encounter occurred way back when, during his Two Guys, A Girl, and a Pizza Place phase, and he seemed to be rocking some rather questionable blond highlights.

Ryan was alone, looking at cars, and he seemed a bit aloof. I sat on a bench, nursing a Cafe Mocha and waiting for the boring yearly ritual of car show attendance to end. I checked out Ryan pretty thoroughly for a couple of minutes, then went back to spacing out.

2.) Ryan Reynolds - Part Deux

I was a lethargic captive on yet another dreadful public transit ride when I saw Ryan for the second time, just months after my initial RR sighting. He was sitting at a dining table outdoors, on the patio of an upscale restaurant named Feenie's, which was located close to my home.

Feenie's was run by internationally-renowned chef Rob Feenie and featured ridiculously overpriced comfort food, such as mac and cheese with truffles. Feenie's also had the benefit of being located directly across the street from a garish KFC, which may be one of the reasons why the restaurant has tanked.

Ryan was a brunette during Part Deux - as he should be - and looked delicious as he sat outside, sucking in the chicken grease fumes from across the street. Overall, a sexy encounter, but I couldn't help but notice that his eyes seem a little too close together, like Dubya's.

1.) Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle

I was downtown, driving around with a friend, when I experienced my favourite celebrity encounter. Imagine my delight as I beheld a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle taking a break from filming and enjoying a tasty snack out on the street!

Vancouver turned surreal as I imagined a society of Ninja Turtles protecting the city streets and noshing on 99 cent pizza slices with fake cheese. I was ashamed to be so excited, but my friend was pretty stoked, too, so I just enjoyed the moment.

I look forward to your contributions :)